"There comes a time for each of us, when
everything seems shallow, except the
longing of our soul to find its own true path."
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Diaries by Sacinandana Swami

The Diary of a Pilgrim 2016 - Overwhelmed with Gratitude

By Sacinandana Swami

We have just returned with 450 devotees from Ter Kadamba – Rupa Gosvami’s place of worship. It was our 64-rounds day. From morning to evening, we just chanted. Many retreat participants report breakthrough experiences. “For me, a closed window opened – will it stay open?” a devotee asked me with tears in his eyes.

Rupa Gosvami stayed here 500 years ago when it was a jungle area. No cottage, no heating in the winter, no place to keep his writing tools – except the branches of the trees. Why did he not need a mobile phone, transportation, cooking arrangements, etc… all the things without which we modern people can’t imagine to live?

He was constantly bathing in the waves of the ecstatic ocean of Krishna consciousness. He did not think of anyone else than the Lord – 24 hours a day. And like a bee who is nourished by the honey on which he constantly thinks – a cakora bird who survives on the moon rays; a loving wife who depends on her husband; and the poor man who only needs gold for all his needs – he prospered in that divine relationship, overwhelmed with gratitude.

This dependency on the Lord works also today. Everyone – ascetic or family man – needs to situate themselves appropriately, and then depend on the Lord. Once, two great devotees talked about Krishna’s qualities – especially His gratitude, tolerance and compassion – to encourage each other to serve Him happily. One of them then made a stunning statement:

“Krishna becomes controlled by His devotee – by even the slightest amount of service. He smiles patiently even if an intolerable offence is committed against Him. On the other hand, His heart becomes tormented if He sees others suffering – even slightly. When I consider these qualities of my Lord, my heart becomes thirsty for Him.” (Ujjvala-nilamani 10.1)

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